Writing Resources from Fifteen Minutes of Fiction

Hospital visit

We hastened to the hospital-
We went to see young Billy.
He hadn’t meant to hurt himself
In fact he’d just been silly.

His mum stood by the bedside,
Feeling quite perplexed.
Dad looked down at Billy
And said, “Whatever next?”

He'd built a model glider
For his second favouirite ted,
But when he tried to fly his bear
He launched himself instead!

The Fitness Test

Although I'm getting on a bit
I still feel fairly sprightly.
I exercise most every day
and try to sleep well nightly.

While at the gym I thought I'd do
a fitness test. Why not?
I entered in my age and weight
and gave it all I've got.

I worked hard on the stepper.
Up and down I went.
The machine was measuring heart beats.
I was nowhere near being spent.

And when the test was all complete
the numbers weren't complex
but I found I couldn't make them out
without my reading specs!

Memorable Christmas Party

The house was bright with Christmas lights around the roof and gable.
The barbecue was ready and the food was on the table.
Us kids were playing in the yard; the day was all but done,
We didn’t see our cousins much so Christmas was good fun.
‘Come on,’ said Mum, ‘it’s time to eat.’ We scrambled for our places,
Pushing, shoving as we went, with happy smiling faces.
Aunty Jill was there with Tom, but where was Uncle Paul?
For he's our favourite uncle and we'd not seen him at all.
Then we heard some distant bells, a tinkling jingling sound,
And then a louder ‘Ho! Ho! Ho!’ as someone fat and round,
All dressed in red with bulging sack came right up close to us,
And little Jim who’s only two began to make a fuss.
‘There, there,’ said Mum, ‘do not be glum - no need to make that noise.
Santa’s come to visit us. Perhaps he's brought some toys.’
Then Santa reached into his sack and gave each boy and girl
Exciting gift-wrapped packages. Our minds were in a whirl!
When Santa gave my gift to me I saw he wore a ring.
It’s just the same as Uncle Paul’s! Now isn’t that a thing?

Money Back Guarantee

I’m standing at the service desk in a great big queue.
There’s lots of them before me - I’m number 92.
We’re all returning goodies that were bought for Christmas Day.
We’re not completely satisfied. They’re all faulty in some way.

‘It’s little Johnny’s railway train, it won’t stay on the track.’
‘Would you like an exchange then, or d'you want your money back?’
She says she’ll take the money. The form she signs and dates.
Besides he didn’t like the train - he’d rather have some skates.

‘This shirt’s too small for Damien, he’s grown since last December.
I thought it would be big enough but I couldn’t quite remember.’
‘These nuts we bought for Uncle Fred came back.’ The note was brief –
It seems that since last Christmas they’d taken out his teeth.

Patience is a virtue - that’s what they always say
But I can think of lots of things I’d rather do today.

Recipe for Disaster- Salad Dressing

The guests are coming, it’s getting late, the food is all but ready.
Each task is under my control, I keep it slow and steady.
All it needs is a healthy salad to make our meal complete,
‘Cos salad’s always best, I feel, in our late summer heat.
Now what I need is a recipe for a simple salad dressing
And I’ve got one here I’ve tried before so that saves me from stressing.
Lemon juice and olive oil, crushed garlic and some honey,
Preferably warmed up a bit to make it nice and runny.
A pinch of salt and pepper to taste, then place it in a jar.
Give it all a jolly good shake and there it is – Voila!

Now all went well up to this point, and then came my undoing.
What went wrong? You may well ask – It was my jar-lid screwing.
Yes—it happened—then and there—what I’d always dreaded.
My jar-lid had unfortunately got itself cross-threaded.
You’ve got the picture – there I stood looking like a fool—
With bits of garlic in my hair, the floor a sticky pool,
A greasy stain upon my shirt that went from chin to hips.
The dressing was quite tasty though – I licked it from my lips.
It took some time to wipe it all from benches walls and floor,
And no it wasn’t all complete before I heard the door.

The guests came in and looked at me—they fell about with laughter—
I’ve never managed to live it down even this long after!

First Car Ride

My first ride in a motor car was with my gran and grandpapa.
Such a huge and shining thing with sides so long just like a wing.
In I clambered, all excited. I was so thrilled to be invited.
I stared right out to watch the scene, but then I turned a shade of green.
Stop! Stop! I cried. I'm feeling sick. My mouth is dry. My tongue is thick.
The car pulled over near the gutter, and then my gran was heard to mutter:
What's wrong with him? Poor little chap. And then I lost it in her lap.

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