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Crotchety Young Man Reviews: Dark Knight

I hated Dark Knight. Yeah that's right. But I think you need to understand what I want out of a movie before I dismember this pile 'o poo.

First and Foremost I want a movie that's fun. There are several different ways a movie can be fun. It can be chilling and suspenseful like Cloverfield. A movie can be funny and just plain stupid like Get Smart. A movie can be action packed like Live Free Die Hard.

Dark knight was none of these. Well most of the movie was none of these. I felt LARGE portions of the movie where utterly useless appendages just waiting to be removed by the director. For instance, the "love" story between Bruce Wayne and [whatever her name was here] was boring and useless. I didn't even like the woman. She seemed manipulative, indecisive, and selfish. I didn't even mind her dieing; I didn't care (remember it's a movie). Now you kill William Wallace's woman and you have a plot point. Two face...BORING

Another reason I thought Dark Knight was a lop sided freak was the "main character" utterly failed to attract any attention or sympathy from me. Bruce Wayne was little more than a cardboard cut out that gave a backdrop to the REAL character of this movie. You know who. The Joker. Now on this point I agree with others, Heath was amazing as the Joker. He was likable, creepy, and devious all at the same time. In short the Joker was FUN. The only fun character in the WHOLE movie. And if I had to choose sides in the Gotham/Batman universe I probably would have chosen his. Why? Because Batman was busy worrying about Gotham's "soul" and the Joker was just blowing stuff up.

In the end I go to the movies to have fun, to be entertained. I don't go to the movies to be preached at about man's inherit evil nature (that's another post). So if I were to remake this movie, I would make it entirely about the Joker...and explosions.

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