Writing Resources from Fifteen Minutes of Fiction

The Gift Exchange

"R.G. Coles Toys for Naughty Boys, how may I help you?"
"Yes I wanna return a present that I think was bought there, you see..."
"Oh I am sorry young man, we have a strict return procedure here, and none of our presents are returnable. It's been the company policy for over one hundred years. It just wouldn't be fair to the purchaser, who obviously put a lot of thought into your gift."
"What are you talking about, coal, I got a lump of coal."
"Yes sir that is all we sell at R.G. Coles, hence our name 'Toys for Naughty Boys'. However, it is not an easy task to select one of our gifts and all of our customers only come here to shop after much soul searching. You must understand it just wouldn't be fair to allow you to exchange a gift you surely must have deserved."
"But I wasn't that bad, I mean, sure I got expelled for sticking gum in Becky Sues hair again and then instead of doing my chores I burnt down the barn trying to make fireworks but I wern't that bad..."
"Young man wern't is not a word."
"Yeah, I ain't doing too good in school neither."
"I have to assume you received our model 225 super lump, it goes only to the naughtiest boys."
"Aw please Mister, I don't wanna lump of coal for Christmas, can't you do something about it."
"There is a procedure in place, although we seldom use it, to exchange your gift. You must display your gift in a proper place for all the world to see and if you behave for one full year..."
"Oh I will Mister I promise."
"Yes I can see, as I was saying behave for a year and only then can you bring the gift back to us and we will give you a certificate to use at our other store, 'Where Angels Play'. Now there are limitations..."
"Thanks, that's great; I knew there was a loop hole. I'll see you in a year."

After hanging up, the store manager wrote a memo to the CEO, 'SC I have a feeling we will need to increase production of our 225's for next year'.

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